“Analysis of death is not for the sake of becoming fearful but to appreciate this precious lifetime.” — Dalai Lama
When we fear death, we stop living.
We like to feel invincible or immortal for that matter. But not thinking about death won’t make your life last forever. It takes guts to confront this vulnerable truth: the only sure thing is how uncertain life is.
We avoid thinking about death, yet we fear it in silence. Keeping the “what if I die tomorrow?” question present will free you from that worry that exists at a subconscious level.
Try this exercise I learned from Bernie Roth at Stanford. Answer one question at a time.
- Imagine you have 10 min to live, what would you do?
- And ten days? And ten months? And ten years?
- And the rest of your life?
Every time I facilitate this exercise in a workshop, it catches everyone off-guard.
We take time for granted. But when the end is around the corner, we regret our assumptions.
Some folks feel guilty for what they haven’t done (e.g., not saying: “I love you” or “sorry” more often). Some people get anxious about finishing (or starting) their most valuable project. Everyone agrees that they want to spend their last 10 minutes with their close family.
This exercise is very moving, especially done in a group setting. The premise of confronting our (future) death is a powerful reflection on how we are living.
The purpose of this exercise is to stop taking life for granted. Like it happened to me when I had to survive the cold weather in Patagonia. Live as if you were going to die tomorrow.
Adding a sense of urgency to your life makes you focus on what really matters. Spend your energy doing something worthy of your time on Earth.
Buddhism promotes meditating on death and dying as a way to embrace it and prepare in advance. Most people find this idea absurd. But, as I said before, ignoring your worries won’t make ‘death’ disappear.
As Zasep Tulku Rinpoche said: “Life is too short. Death can happen anytime; you don’t know when. As we get older, we know we don’t have much time left. I’ve got maybe ten years, fifteen years, maybe twenty years. So, the time goes fast, and death’s going to happen sooner or later.”
Also, meditating on death is useful for family members, nurses, or doctors — it‘s good to know more about how to be helpful in these times.
Death is both inevitable and uncertain. We know it will happen, but we don’t know when. Our human body — our whole existence — is very fragile. Spiritual practice can train our mind to accept that truth instead of being in denial.
Even if you feel skeptical, I would recommend you give this death meditation a try.
As Tibetan lama, Chagdud Rinpoche said: “When you have to go to the bathroom, it’s too late to build a latrine.” Don’t start thinking about death until it is too late.
By Gustavo Razzetti for Liberationist.org
Image: Cover of “What If You Die Tomorrow?” by Ashokindu, Ramesh Publishing House
